Insane sleep deprived thoughts......*cackle* cackle*

Drowned cell phones,spoiled cats & cheap houses

Well, I woke up this morning at 3:45 to the sound of my water glass being spilled all over the remotes. I thought I was going to “outsmart” Cavuto. HA! Silly silly girl.

Last night I put my water glass in the little basket I use to carry all my phones around,thinking that would stop him from knocking the glass over.

I groggily reach over and set the whole damn basket upright, grab my cell phone and try to put it out of the way ….SPLASH….oh good one, I plop my cell phone right into what is left of the glass of water. (enter many cuss words here)

Cavuto happily meowing and proud of himself. Thrilled to be awake and happy as a clam. Head butting, purring,(more cussing) I finally get up. I give up.

I thought of this invention…where I sleep with my head in an upside down laundry basket. Kind of a head cage. LOL

I may just work on that after work today.

Note to everyone: Don’t call me on my white cell phone today.

Yesterday E and I worked all day and pretty much accomplished nothing. We did however ,preview every cheap house in Hot Springs. So if you are looking to buy one ,better call me quick while my memory is still fresh! There are a few really good ones for under $80,000

I went to bed about 7;30 last night.

I got off work , had to go to the grocery store .It was then that it occurred to me….”how am I supposed to eat with no microwave?”

No lean cuisines…no heated up leftovers. Ack!!

I wound up coming home ,as exhausted as I was and having to COOK. I bought some stuffed grape leaves and made a “grape leaf quiche” it was mighty yummy too.And I have plenty of it left…….but no way to heat it up.

Mmmmmm cold quiche for days.

Ya don’t realize how spoiled you are until one of life's little nicety's is taken away.No microwave….how primitive. LOL

Well, my house is still a sty from vacation and I will not have time to clean it (or be awake) ha ha ,until tomorrow or the next day. I have floor today.(please! Let me get a decent client out of it)

I’ll be back to let you know. Have a great day ya’ll …and if you’re still sleeping…I hate you.:)

Pirates,my wonderful Pirates........

Ahoy mateys!

Well, if you love the Pirates like I do ……get yourself down to the theater and see the new Pirates movie.

Conehead and I went and saw it yesterday. Loved it!! It,s funny, it’s sad, it’s swashbuckling greatness!!

I have learned to trust movie critics about as much as I trust weathermen. LIARS! The whole lot of them!!

Conehead laughed at me as I packed up my movie purse. Which is an old style Dooney purse, it holds my OWN drinks, and snacks.

Well , she wasn’t laughing anymore when she had to pay 4 bucks for a coke.

There is more Captain Jack than you can shake a stick at. Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightly are adorable as usual,and the monkey is back ,better than ever. You even get to see what Davey Jones really looks like.

It’s 3 hours long , but it ends before you want it to. We can only hope that there WILL be a part 4.

Have a great day ya’ll , I’m off to get ready for work.

part two of Eureka Part one (a video)

some more veiwing pleasure of all kindsa cool stuff for you. (this one is A LOT shorter than the other!)

http://www.dotphoto.com/go.asp?l=new+dog&p=B1AD&AID=4532476&Pres=Y

OH YEAH !

(This is where "Oldy" will post whatever she wants to say .)

Below, is the link to her video/slideshow. you better go do whatever ya need to do NOW, because it is LOOOONG! but worth it!
when you get there... click where it says "watch show".
VERY KOOL.

(5-29 update!..... i just realized, if you hit the forward button on the video...you can go thru as fast or slow as you want to!!!!! you will miss a lot of the transitions...but it takes tons less time to watch...so it's still enjoyable, and you can still hear the music if you want to. OH YEAH!)

http://www.dotphoto.com/go.asp?l=new+dog&p=B1AD&AID=4528195&Pres=Y

Eureka part2

She is totally freaked out like a giant baby huey. This cracks me up about her, that inside she is such an emotional foo foo. LOL



We put the cat back out lest this bloated dog tick decides to get on us. We were BOTH too foo foo to attempt removing the tick. But we did inform the office that he had a tick. They can do that gross task.



We slept just fine on our miniscule bed. Naturally I woke up at the crack of dawn. Once I was able to force poodles to get up , we got ready , packed up and checked out. Then went back thru to see all the cats again. We made it out of there just in time , as we were leaving there was a busload of about 50 kids lined up to get in.



We agreed to stop at the first restaurant we found to eat breakfast. This happened to be about 50 miles down the road, in some Mayberry town. Our waitress was a snobby hag . But the food was good.




It took forever to get home. We were hoping there would be somewhere to stop on the way .But we only stopped in Benton at goodwill , because I was so tired I could hardly keep my eyes open.




Then E calls me and asks when am I going to get home. I said in about an hour. Well , the previous day , she had shown a girl this old house and the gril wanted to bring her boss and her friends to see it. But E was in Texas. So , poodles and I get to town and ,I drag her with me to show the girl and her friends this house. They take their sweet time too. We had not eaten since breakfast and they finally got out of the house around 7 p.m.




We go right downtown to find some food. We wind up at Magnolias.The atmosphere leaves something to be desired , but the food is good and cheap.I think she got a t-bone for 13 bucks.





Then we FINALLY get home. And what do we find? Two loose dogs on the porch . I have never seen them around here before. I give them some food and water and check the lost and found ads , online. We call one ad at about 10 p.m. and the lady has trouble describing her missing dog.

Turns out to be the wrong dogs. But one of these is a solid black pug. Left out loose all night , I’m pretty sure they will be road kill by morning. So we lock them on my patio and at the crack of dawn I let them back out.



They immediately run out and attack a neighbors dogs. (I didn’t know this until later on ,when someone told me)
The dogs were gone after that , so I assume the neighbor called the pound on them.



If you’re missing a couple dogs in Hot Springs, please check the dog pound.




The next day we had a lazy day and pretty much just did errands and later on floozie2 and her family came over for a while. We had planned on going in the pool that day , but were just too tired.




Later on that evening the people with the missing dogs I had spoken to on the phone came by to show us pictures of their dogs. They have been missing for over a week .



The next day I had to drive poodles to the airport. I’m soooo tired. Usually after cavuto waking me up at some ungodly hour for days in a row, I will have a lazy day in there to rest up. But this time it’s been over 10 days of it with no day of rest. This morning at 4 , when he stated pawing my face I actually started crying. ACK!!
It’s like having a freakin’ baby . I’m too old for this crap.




I spent hours yesterday , downloading pictures , only to have them “not work” ack!!!
Hopefully my sister will remedy this situation today. ;)




Have a great day ya’ll. I’m sure a nap will be in my future. And this afternoon I’m going to see the new Pirates movie.

Later!

Eureka !!! part one

I’m back ya’ll. My vacation is over. I took Poodles to the airport yesterday. On the way there , I had taken a benedryl for my puffy allergy eyes and man…. All the way home I could barely stay awake. I was slapping my cheeks, chain smoking and still about to fall asleep.I got home and went straight to nap time. LOL Then went to bed at 9 on top of that.




Cavuto woke me up this morning at 4:28.ack!!!! why ??? why does he do this???Why not 7 ?




I have to go back to work today , so I will try and recap what I can , right now while the hair color is cooking on my head.




We spent a couple days going out on the boat. One day Floozie 2 and Conehead went with us. We had a blast . Poodles and I got in a melted chocolate fight.




My aunt LOO LOO came and spent the night with us one night. And we all went to an actual bar….to hear E’s husband sing Karaoke.We had no idea how expensive bars had become NOR were we prepared for the behavior of the younger generation. We were shocked and disgusted. Some girl was having a birthday party and her and her friends (female friends ,mind you) were lap dancing each other, kissing each other on the dance floor . Etc….



We did not really know what to make of it. It was reminiscent of what Sodom and Gomorrah must have been like.



Other than that part, we had fun. We danced a little , drank very little (too expensive) lol and we were out of there by 11.We listened to Englad2 sing and there was a little cowboy there who was about to get a record deal, he was an awesome singer. We got his autograph. Lol




Then it was off to our road trip…. The drive seemed FOREVER. We got to Branson on our first night. Our hotel was nothing to write home about. We checked in and went to the old downtown area. There were tons of antique stores and an old main street area. But guess what? Everything closed at 5:00 P.M.




So then it was off to find somewhere to eat dinner. We wanted something that wasn’t a chain , so we went in one place.”closed for remodeling” We drove around and saw buffet after buffet.The whole town seemed to be one big “strip” with motels, buffets and t-shirt stores. We finally wound up eating at Mickey Gilleys. AND I was allowed to smoke in there.:) We both had chicken fried steak . And it was yummy.




The next morning we went out to the lobby for our free breakfast and the place was packed with a bus load of senior citizens. We had to stand and wait for a table.





Then we checked out and headed for the outlet malls. We went to both of them and they were so expensive neither one of us bought anything. Then we headed for Eureka Springs. We could not find the road that map quest told us to take so we had to go the long way. Once we got there we both fell in love with Eureka Springs. It was a really old town up in the hills , with shops and brick sidewalks.it reminded me very much of Manitou Springs Colorado.We looked in tons of little shops and took pictures of old houses ,and sights along the way.I saw a man wearing a skirt . Not a kilt mind you, but a brown skirt ……looked like carhart material. The cops rode around on bicycles. I took a picture of one of them and then realized I had a picture of more than I thought. Lol





We went in some Italian place and ordered Italian beef sandwiches. Well , they were totally repulsive! The aus jus was like thick onion soup. We said “um , these are awful and we can not eat them” The girl said “we’ve never had a complaint.” So poodles goes”well, she used to live in Chicago!” lol like that explains everything.





Then ,still starving, we took a trolley back to where the truck was parked and headed off for the cat preserve to check in to our tree house.We check in and it really is sort of like a tree house. A few steps above camping. It had a kitchen and air conditioning and a very small bathroom. It was awesome. It had a pull down ladder to get to the beds up in the loft ,which felt very much like a box spring with no mattress. Lol



I’m scared of the ladder in my garage and was not looking forward to trying to navigate that thing in the dark. There was no light up in the loft , just a flashlight.





We unpacked a little and then walked over to see the cats.They were just incredible.The tigers were enormous! And the sounds they make sounded like the dinosaurs on Jurasic Park. They had cougars, lions, tigers, bears , a monkey , a black leopard and a bobcat I think. But I tell you , if you were out in the wild and heard that noise …you would be scared to death!!





We took the walking tour , where one of the interns told us about each cat.A lot of them were there because people tried to have them as pets and later, realized how stupid that was. So they can not be returned to the wild. And some of them have been declawed and had their fangs removed.(this was done on the panther with a pair of pliers)





And others were there because people had been breeding them for profit .Especially the white tigers. They were breeding a brother and sister. Some of the cats are deformed because of this inbreeding.And several of the cats came from a raid ,where they were being mistreated and malnourished .





The intern told us that in the state of Texas alone , there are more tigers kept in captivity than there are tigers in the wild.





The cats have habitats ,which are big grassy enclosures where they have room to run and live like they are not in a cage ,but these habitats cost a lot of money and are not yet available for all of the cats. The cats in temporary housing are in large cage type enclosures, they have logs and a little den. Some of them had a big horse water tub.But the goal is for all of them to get their own habitat. So if you have any excess money lying around …please donate to Turpentine creek. It was a wonderful ,clean and caring place.





Ok , back to my tale…. We are still starving all this time. Lol After the tour we wait until 5 to watch them feed the cats. They eat mostly raw chicken. This place is in Tyson chicken farm country , so 90 percent of their food is donated by Tyson chicken. The bears eat dog chow and vegetables.




They bring the cats food around in a big wheel barrow and throw it in through the top of the cage .I expected them to voraciously go after the food like a “wild animal” lol but they didn’t , they delicately ate it , just like a house cat.




They also played and acted very much like enormous house cats. One tiger was playing in his big water tub acting just like cavuto does. It was adorable!






We were 7 miles from town and decided to go the other way to the gas station and buy bread and just eat sandwiches out of the stuff we brought with us. Well , all the gas station had was hot dog buns. Ack! Forget it , we drove all the way back the other direction to Eureka springs and wound up eating at a Bavarian Restaurant.It was pretty late when we got back to our tree house. So we walked around a little, took more pictures and then tried sitting on the porch. We were run off by giant palmetto bugs.So then we decide that we are not willing to sleep up in that loft. The couch turns into a very small bed , it was called a “clicker couch” the back folds down by the seat and there you have it. So we were both willing to cram into that thing rather than go up the ladder into the dark and maybe buggy loft. Lol






We hear the cougars out in the dark ..making these huge dinosaur noises , then we hear “meow”


We thought we were losing it. Lol




“didn’t that sound like a regular cat?”

“yeah , I thought I was hearing things.”






Nope, we open the door and there is our new friend a brownish cat.We let it in and feed it some lunch meat , then poodles discovers that it has a big tick on it’s back. Ack!!~



http://www.dotphoto.com/go.asp?l=new+dog&p=B1AD&AID=4528195&Pres=Y



To be continued.......

So far away...

souls sis2 from soulmange on Vimeo

souls sis from soulmange on Vimeo

Cats,hats and boats....oh my!

Ola ya'll ,

I am exhausted. I'm craving a huge iced mocha from Starbucks.....make it a double!

I still have too much work to do to do a very long post , so I'm going to throw up some pictures and call it a post.

Speaking of throwing up, I just noticed that some cat threw up all over my dryer and it suspiciously looks like whipped cream mixed with cat food.

Hope ya'll had a nice mothers day. I did. Went to the breakfast buffet with Floozie1 and then spent hours and hours out on the boat. Floozie 2 and her family tied their boat up to mine and we had a grand old time.AND I talked to all my chillin's .

Here's the pics. Enjoy!






O' Reilly actin' all Pimp...lol













Monkey , caught in an unguarded moment. Almost looks "normal" doesn't she?

















How to be romantic.....
take a lesson people...they are dancing on the boat!
So sweet ,I could have cried.
If it wasn't for , you know ...the anti-depressants.










We love you SEARAY!!!

I actually got IN the lake for the first time this year.

77 whopping degree water temp.

Very refreshing.










We are alllll so getting one of these hats! this was really a cute look. Who knew?

(An artsy shot of floozie2)












An artsy shot of Conehead.












An artsy shot of yours truly.
The ONLY one I would dare post , actually.









The PROUD owner of the hat.
Floozie2's spouse.










Floozie in a toga. LOL









The Classic Arkansas boat ....with the greatest name ever.











And last but not least......remember

You saw it HERE first!




I'll catch up soon, I promise.
Later peeps

QUEEN EARLENES' FINEST: check THIS out.... i told you something interesting might happen !

OOOH! click the link below to see the horror of the "thing" that was at my sisters house. *cringe*



QUEEN EARLENES' FINEST: check THIS out.... i told you something interesting might happen !


I'll try and post tomorrow , I'm tired and sunburned.

Later peeps!

title removed...due to international pervs

Cavuto woke me up at 3:30 this morning. Isn’t that special? NOT!

Why would he do this, you ask? Because he wasn’t spoiled enough, so my spouse started giving him a little dish of whipped cream every morning. Now, it’s the middle of the damn night and he starts with the head butting, the “petting “ my eyes with his claws, the meowing. He will keep it up until I am so wide awake that I have no choice but to get up and give him his dang whipped cream.

ACK!

******************************************************************************************************

It’s been a very busy week of working for no money. Pretty soon we should have this town saturated with our smiling mugs .

My cell phone has been stuck on speaker phone all week .Yesterday ,I am sitting in the sushi restaurant and that phone goes off. Knowing that the voice will be amplified all over the restaurant ,I jump up and make a beeline for the bathroom. I kind of back in
real quick. “Hello”

Blaring voice….”HI I’m CALLING ABOUT THAT HOUSE IN SHERIDAN”

“blah ,blah, blah,” (naturally he can’t afford it) I hang up. It is then that I notice the two urinals hanging on the wall.

CRAP! I’m in the mens room!!!! I didn’t stick around to see if I was alone or not.

******************************************************************************************************

Earlier that morning we had to go to 4 houses and take pictures. On one house, the listing agent told me

“you have to go there before 10”

Ok, I figure the guy must work nights or something. Fine.

So I show up at the crack of dawn, ring the doorbell. Some naked guy in a bathrobe answers the door.

“Oh , great , Jack didn’t tell you I was coming?”

“No”

“I’ll kill him for this.”

“NO, I’LL kill him.”

I assume Jack meant to say AFTER 10!!!

*********************************************************************************************************

A few days ago, I am on floor duty. Some guy calls and says “I’d like to sell my house that I bought about a year ago.”

I’m thinking “woo hooo….and easy one…dropping right into my lap!”

Ha ha …I should have learned by now to NEVER think that.

The guy says “ I’ll be there with in the hour.”

We close at 6. So I’m waiting, and waiting and waiting. I finally give up on him about 6:40, leave him a note on the door to reschedule and go to get in my truck to leave. I see this guy walking up, carrying a clipboard.

He’s scruffy, unshaven and wearing some of those slip on suede shoes (like they sell at lands end) with no socks. A dirty white t-shirt and some shiny athletic shorts complete his ensemble.

My white trash radar tells me this is my “client.”

Sure enough ….it is . He comes over to talk to me .The stench of B.O. is floating around him like a big cloud.

I’m not about to go back into the “closed” office alone with him. So I give him some papers and he says he has to go out of town til Wednesday. He’s supposed to call me when he gets back.

Tuesday, E (my partner) and I decide to go over there and check the place out. We’re not expecting anyone to be there. We were just going to check out the outside. Well, right as we get there this girl comes out the door. We tell her who we are and she offers to give us the grand tour.

Boy, were we in for a treat! We walk in the front door and the aroma of dog doodie nearly knocks us over. The rug is patterned in various stains. There are just piles of stuff everywhere, clothes, beer bottles, overflowed ashtrays. A pit bull, lying under the cluttered coffee table.

Sa-weet!

Then she starts to lead us up the stairs….a pitch black stair well. “Isn’t there a light?”

“Yeah, but it doesn’t work.”

We literally feel our way up the stairs, by having to touch the wall. I am horrified that I am going to stick my hand in a mess of cockroaches.

This is one of the apartments. The house has been made into 3 or 4 of them. This delightful penthouse unit sports one room and sort of a kitchen off to the side. It’s dark in here too because only one light works. Two unmade beds, piles of stuff and some nifty ,70’s black light art.

Our tour guide goes on to tell us all about “the code violations they have received and that if they don’t fix them, they will all be evicted.”

She tells us about the 15 dogs that live there.(the 5 we actually saw , were all 60 pound pit bulls) And that she has 2 toddlers, also living in this hovel.

We feel our way back down the stairs to see one of the lower units. She tries every light …and finally finds one that works. She shrugs and says “I don’t live down here”

Shockingly, I do not see any roaches. And I tell her so. I guess they are scared to come there.

We thank her for the lovely tour and tell her “we’re just gonna look around outside, maybe take a couple pictures”

Four huge dogs are in a pen and one large red nose pit bull, is loose , milling around our feet .A very hostile woman steps out of her apartment and says ”what are YOU taking pictures of?”

We explain who we are and she says “oh, they’re selling it AGAIN? He just bought it a month ago!”

Well, what a tangled web we weave…..A client who lies?

I can't believe it. LOL

Yesterday was the big day …and big surprise ….our client did not call us back.

So it remains to be seen whether we will get this listing of a lifetime. I will let you know what happens.

I don’t dare post the pictures here…..you know …in case someone stumbled upon them. But if you would like to see them, let me know and I’ll email ‘em to ya.

*************************************************************************************************

Today is my day off. YIPPEEEEE!!! I hope to be out on the boat later.

Have a great day ya’ll!

an occasional day in the life of me

Not ME really....but an awesome picture ...music thing my sister did on her blog.

It's really SEVERAL days in a life of an entire family. Really cool.

click this link......



an occasional day in the life of me

Yes , my life really IS this exciting. ...

Ok, been too busy to do a REAL post ...so if you read this...consider yourself tagged ..to steal this meme.I'll catch up ..soon.


1. Ever kissed a blonde haired, blue eyed person?
Yeah , may have even married one.

2. Can you see a phone right now?
all 3 of them

3. What are you listening to?
Forensic files

4. Where is it coming from?
the t.v ,behind me.

5. Last thing you ate?
Chicken fajitas about noon.

6. What was the last thing you saw on TV?
Last thing I actually watched? Law and order.

7. Who was the last person other than family you saw?
A very smelly dirty guy who was trying to list his house.

8. Song stuck in your head?
None , this second ….but earlier…some country song I don’t even know.

9. One word to describe yourself.
FAT

10. Do you have a tan right now?
No. I'm albino. Actually kind of a yellowish albino.. maybe I have jaundice or scurvy. LOL

11. Do you dance while getting ready for... whatever?
No, but sometimes while I’m cleaning ,I do.

12. What are you wearing?
A ratty t shirt and some black work out pants. SEX_AY


13. What is the most people you've been in front of?
IT’s always TOO many.

14. Have you ever watched the show RockStar?
No, I dont even know what it is.

15. Have you ever taken a bath/shower while you were drunk ?
Not of my own choice.

16. Do you like techno?
Don’t even know what it is. Is that that “headache music “?

18. What is one country you want to go to?
Anywhere tropical!!!

19. Have you ever made out on a plane?
No, but I have cleaned up vomit on a plane.

20. Have you ever jumped up on a stage that a band was playing on?
No, not that I recall. lol

21. Do you have leadership skills?
Only if I feel like I’m the most qualified to be the leader.

22. Are you musically inclined?
HAH, NO! when I try to sing in the car , my husband turns the radio UP.

23. Have you ever sat on a roof and looked at stars?
No , but I sat in a semi truck and saw a whole bunch of falling stars.


24. Ever looked at the stars while talking on the phone to a boyfriend/girlfriend?
Um, maybe. I didn't really take note of it.

25. Does the song "Stairway To Heaven" make you sad?
No.It makes me gag.

26. Do you have alcohol in your room?
Right now, yes.

THE THREES:

1. Name 3 schools you went to:
So , so many…..lets see
Bakersfield High School
West High School
A government 1st grade in Puerto Rico

2. Name 3 things in your wallet:
I don’t have a wallet. I like my stuff loose and lost …so it’s easier to find.
3 things in my purse
I.D.
Credit cards
Pepper spray

5. Name 3 favorite fruits:
Nectarines
Bananas
Grapes

6. Name 2 of your favorite foods:
Mexican food
Fat gravy-ish southern food

THE WHERES:

2. Where is your phone?
Right now , in my little phone basket. All 3 of them.

3. Where is/are your parent(s) right now?
In Heaven I hope.

4. Where is the last place you took a ride to?
Work. The joy!

THE WHATS:

1. What did you just eat?
Nothing

2. What color bra/boxers are you wearing?
Black bra, no boxers

3. What is the closest item near you that is blue?
My glass

4. What is your favorite color?
Don’t really have one. If it’s clothes…ugh ..black.

5. What is your favorite website?
Don’t have just one. The blogs I read and the recipe ones , I guess.

6. What kind of surgery have you had?
Ganglion cyst, appendectomy (at 7 months pregnant!),hysterectomy,

7. What do you wear more: jeans or shorts?
Jeans.

THE WHENS:

1. When did you start school?
First grade. We lived in Sheridan when I was 5 and they had NO kindergarten.

2. When is your birthday?
August 17th

3. When did you last go to the mall?
You mean the old crapfest we CALL a mall? About a week ago. I left empty handed, as usual.

4. When was the last time you bought a pair of pants?
I bought some Levi’s a couple months ago.

5. When did you last ponder your existence?
Probably ..never.

Schleprock day....and a plea for help.

Yesterday was totally a “Murphy’s law “day! I swear, everything we touched went wrong.

The day started at 4:30 A.M. with Cavuto snagging his claws through my eyelids.

Note to self: cut that damn cats claws!!

I go through the usual hell of trying to find something to wear. I have a closet stuffed FULL of clothes and shoes and nothing fits right or looks good on. ACK!!I finally settle on some fat hiding black , as usual, and some old school wooden Dr. Scholl shoes. Real cute , red with strawberries painted on them.

Note to self: begin starvation diet immediately.

My sidekick E gets here and we head off to the office to print a bunch of papers off a C.D. we had made the day before.

“Where’s the C.D.?”

“You have it.”

“No I don’t , you must have it.”

We both search our briefcases stuffed full of crap. Guess what? Neither one of us has the C.D.

Back to my house to search for the C.D. I finally find it, where I had left it…in the computer. ACK!

Back to the office to print the stuff. Well naturally , the color printer refuses to print. It keeps saying that my “access code is wrong” (insert expletive)

E decides she will take the C.D. home and try to print them from there. The problem is , there is a ton of RED on the papers so ,at home it would probably empty out our ink supply.

By now , my feet feel like I’ve been walking on two by four blocks all day. We head off to office depot to get some pronged folders.

We get there and E parks way out in the parking lot.

“Tell me you are not gonna park way out here and make me hobble over there in these damn
shoes.”

She moves to a closer parking spot. THANK YOU !

We get in there and discover that all the folders are

1. Too chincy
2. Too expensive
3. Too ugly
4. .Too white

(Insert expletive)

We end up only buying 4 of them , at 5 dollars a pop.

Hobble back out to her car. Next up, is supposed to be lunch. It’s 2 :00 by now. And we have accomplished NOTHING.

(insert expletive)

Her spouse is meeting us for lunch . So we arrive before he does and she gets a beer and I get a drink, (it’s been that kind of day) lol

Our waitress is this adorable little single mother. Turns out she has 3 boys the youngest is only 6 months old.

E asks her " man, do you at least have family to help you out?”

“no, my mom died last year, my grandma died a month before she did”

Whew, de javu…I used to be her. (I silently thank God that those days are long gone)

Old age does have it’s perks. J

E’s spouse arrives and we finally order some lunch. Right as the food gets there, E’s phone rings. It is the office ,informing her that she is supposed to be on floor duty RIGHT NOW.

(insert expletive)

WE get our food to go. She rushes back to the office . Her husband drops me off at home where I proceed to eat the worst buffalo chicken sandwich I have ever had in my life. And I paid 16 bucks for it!!! (insert expletive)

The rest of the evening, everything I touched continued to malfunction. The computer kept freezing up. I could not get into my email. My out of town sellers finally told me to lower the price on their house. I can not get into the program to do it. ACK!!

I finally give up and call it a day. A totally wasted day. Lol

I should have stayed in bed and read a novel all day.

Today I vow to have a great day!!!(with very painful feet) Ya’ll do the same!

But wait,first I want you to do me a favor.....E and I need to come up with a "name" for our little team. These are the pictures we'll be using in our ads.

So, look at these pictures and give me some of your great ideas. (PLEASE!!!)

Thanks!!

Later peeps.

Life's been dull.....GUEST POST! By WEIS

THIS is a guest post by my eldest child ......about their snowboarding trip .

Thursday night / Friday

I actually got everything packed and ready to go BEFORE 4am this time, which is a good thing because my flight leaves jax at 6:00am!!! The plan is for the limo to pick me up at 4am and I manage to lay down for bed around 11.. plenty of time for sleep! Not a chance.. tossing and turning for many, many hours.. probably 3 trips to the bathroom.. finally I fall asleep only to be awoken by the phone ringing.

“hello”

“hey it’s so and so from first coast limousine.. I’m outside your house.”

“what!? What time is it!?”

“3 o’clock”

“you weren’t supposed to be here til 4!!!”

“duh.. day… derrr.. they didn’t tell me.. something something”

“Ok, I’ll be out shortly”

Nice.

So I jump out of bed, into the shower for 5 minutes and drag my ass and luggage out to the idiot waiting in my driveway.

Oh yeah.. I have 300lbs worth of flyers to load into the car for the limo company sitting in my living room. I start carrying them out a box at a time.

The idiot driver just stands out there and loads them into the car.. allowing me to do all the work.

Excellent.

Finally I’m done carrying heavy boxes and climb into the car to head to the airport.

We arrive at the ghost-town of an airport. Since the limo ride was free, I tip the imbecile driver $20 despite his robbing me of an hour of sleep. There’s hardly a soul to be seen anywhere. The check-in lines don’t open for another 30 minutes. Lo and behold!!! In my haste to leave the house, thanks to the idiot driver, I neglected to print out my itinerary! I don’t even know which airline I’m flying on!!!

Who do I call? Who will actually answer at this hour? I call my mom and miraculously she answers. I ask her to read the email with the flight info in it to me. The dumb email mentions 2 different airlines.. us airways and united!

They happen to be on total opposite sides of the terminal. My flight seems to be the first one out of the airport this morning. I really want to get my ticket and go sleep at the gate!!! But there are not any ticket agents and I don’t know which of the two airlines it actually is.. so I guessed and stood near united. I was right!

FINALLY, I’m checked in and on the freakin’ plane.. HAZAH!

I change planes in Washington DC. (Apparently the much more ghetto of DC’s airports) I could care less. I found a wendy’s and bought a sausage, egg and cheese biscuit. By the time I get to my gate, they are boarding. I noticed that the screen says that my plane arrives in Denver 30 minutes earlier than I told logan. I send him a quick text message. I get on the plane, sit down and cram the greasy food into my craw. The plane takes off and I cover my head with my coat and go to sleep.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

In the middle of the flight, the flight attendant gets on the loudspeaker.. “BLAH BLAH BLAH THIS CREDIT CARD!!! EARN FREQUENT FLYER MILES BLAH BLAH BLAH…” It’s excruciatingly loud and goes on for what seems like an eternity!” Then I’m back out like a light…

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Nearing Denver I finally get up.. start preparing to get off the plane.. It lands.. I get off..

Logan meets me in the baggage claim area.. says that they drove 108mph trying to get there by the time I text messaged them. Needless to say, the plane arrived even later than originally thought and they had been waiting for over an hour. Nice.

We get in the car and head for Breckenridge!

It doesn’t seem to take very long to get there.. but it was probably an hour and a half.

After going in circles trying to find the check-in place and/or a parking spot we finally pull it off and head up to the actual hotel. We quickly unload the car between the 4 of us. No sooner than we remove the last item out of the trunk does Eric announce that he has locked the keys in the car!!!

We check the hotel closet.. no wire hangers.. just plastic.

We ask some of the other residents.. nada.

One kid makes a phone call and says that some people are going to be meeting him in 15 minutes and they might have a wire hanger.

They arrive and produce the hanger. We begin prying and poking through the car’s weather stripping.. trying to push the unlock button with the hanger. No dice!

Logan unscrews the antenna from the back of the rental car, a 2007 ford Taurus with less than 2,000 miles on it. Bends the antenna beyond recognition and manages to push the unlock button with it.

Nothing happens.

Further prodding at the car and Logan’s able to get the trunk to pop. Much to our dismay, there’s no way in the car through the trunk. Big surprise!

Probably 2 hours into this fiasco, Josh is up in the room sleeping, eric is nowhere to be found and some people show up and offer to call AAA for us.

AAA says they will be here in an hour.. ouch.

Eric suddenly emerges.. he had been chillin’ in the hot tub for the past hour while josh was sleeping and Logan and I were circling this damned car, ever-losing our collective grip on sanity.

We realize that it’s possible to reach your arm through the crack of the seat from the trunk. I go up and wake josh up (he’s got the skinniest arms) and he shoves his arm through with no problem.

Logan, Eric and I attempt to transfer the keys from the front seat to the back using our coat hanger, antenna and butterknife. The keys fall!!!! By some miracle, Logan caught them with the antenna.

*whew*

We finally get the keys into Josh’s hand and out of the car!!!! Woohoo!

Breckenridge closes at 4pm. It’s probably 6 by now, so we decide to go 20 minutes out of town to another resort that has night skiing.

We stop and eat at this pizza place and it’s pretty damned good. A couple pitchers of beer later, we’re ready to hit the slopes. I do surprisingly well!! I guess I didn’t lose every shred of skill from last time I snowboarded.

Saturday

Up at a reasonable hour, we all get into our snowboarding gear and head to the bottom of Beaver Run. OK, so it’s not that reasonable.. we arrive around lunch time.. ravenous with hunger.

The place is a madhouse and they are selling hamburgers. $7 hamburgers!!!

We eat lunch and get in line. IT’S COLD

Once we’re up the freezing ass lift and I’m strapped in.. I notice the courage I had the night before was nowhere to be found.. I BUSTED MY ASS SO MANY TIMES!!!

The misery I remember from the snowboarding trip a few years before comes rushing back to me. I start pissing and moaning during the fleeting seconds between falling on my ass, knees and/or elbows.

I finally make it to the bottom of the mountain and we decide to have a couple beers.. maybe that’s what my problem is.

No such luck.. the liquid courage just makes me more willing to bust my ass.

OUCH.

After another run, we go to another lift called snowflake for the final run of the day. It’s a green run.. which is much more my speed. By now, however, I’ve got very little gas left.

We get back to the hotel and head to the hot tub. We drink a lot of beer.. keystone light to be precise.

The contrast between the snowflakes falling on my face and the soothing jets on my bruised ass is pretty amazing.

10pm and the guy kicks us out of the hot tub.. HOLY CRAP!!! Getting out of 95 degree water in 20 degree cold air is not something I’m accustomed to by any stretch!!!

We get our freezing asses back to the hotel and play poker.. by now I’m deliriously tired and pretty much give my money away betting on the stupidest hands ever.. who cares.. sleepy time!!!

P.s. This commentary was from last years trip....the pictures from this year. Just so ya know.

Door to door...YIKES!!!!

Well , the fun just never ends does it?

Yesterday was our first day of “door knocking” . granted , there were not many people at home , but the one’s that were home had NO intention of opening the door to speak to us. We spoke to a couple women through their glass storm doors.

I guess I can understand the fear…we do look like a couple of escaped hatchet murderers. LOL

NOT!!!!!!!

After that, it was practically a relief to find nobody home. We just stealthily hung our door hangers and hoped that no one spotted us.

I think we will have better luck in the not so affluent neighborhoods. It has been my experience that the more money people have the less friendly they become. (Sad but true)

O’Reilly is tormenting Monkey and I have a ton of work waiting for me. I’ll be back later to do a real post.

Have a great day ya’ll!