Hello....can you hear me?

Hello from Denmark!



I hope my computer gets here soon! We have no cable yet either but hubby has some thing called Mediagate where we can watch shows he's downloaded onto it ,on the tv. We've been watching Seinfeld every night.



I've been pen blogging every day ,with the intention of typing it all when I got my computer ,it may be too much to type by then so hope you guys will be able to read my chicken scratch.I am dying to upload my pictures too.




Yesterday was my first trip on the subway .We went to an area called Fredericksberg. That was actually the other choice we had on where to live ,but the kitchen was too small, no dishwasher ect. (I hope we don't regret that ) Oh ,anyway I'll be going back there in a couple days all by myself.


With hubby in tow is not the time(or the chance) to linger and take pictures and such. It's more like we run the entire time, while steam flows from his ears every time someone moseys right in front of us with their enormous baby stroller.



Thank God that move is OVER! Counting the house in the US ,I have been packing and moving for months. Sick of it ,would be the understatement of the year!



I sure miss everyone and being able to just pick up the phone or get on facebook :) ,hope you all are having good days and behavin'



Be back soon with a real long update so stay tuned ,

Luv me

Girl week part one

Hi ya'll ,


Having a great time . Just got back from Memphis . I've been busy as hell ,too busy to do a real post so here are a couple videos until I get caught up.


Hope you all are behaving and all's good in your worlds.


Love me

Pardon me, do you have any rat traps?

Happy Thursday Y'all,


The first week after my husband leaves always sucks. You'd think I could bounce right back after all these years of it.But ...noooooo.
The first week ,I'm a lazy ,sad bum.

Oh well, that week is almost over.
:))

I'm about to attempt to quit smoking (for the millionth time)
Today..so wish me luck with that.





Yesterday I went to the "half of a half " store.
Look at this MOB that was waiting to get in the door.

Wednesday is the day the get new stuff in. WOO HOO!!

I found a couple awesome things . A polka dotted bra, some jeweled flip flops and a pair of shorts.

All for under 20 bucks. Score!





Last night the UPS man brought me an unexpected package.

My oldest son sent me this box of gourmet goodies.

THANKS WEIS!!!







I assume that the rat trap is a joke. :)

I did make dinner last night using the tahnini.

I'll post the recipe later on.







My new pirate cup.

Mama luvs pirates.










Sweet sleeping babies.....








Making himself right at home there. lol








"I love this stroller!"






"so do I!!!"

I actually haven't taken them out in it yet . i don't have their harnesses yet. Maybe they'll come today in the mail.


I'm running late on my chores this morning. Cavuto actually let me sleep in. Yippeee!!!

I'm off to get busy. Have a great day peeps!

New blog

perhaps you did not get the memo. :)

I have a new blog over at

http://catsonthecounter.blogspot.com/

I will only be updating this one if it is some "top secret" stuff with my spouse involved.
Should that happen, I will notify you by email.

so bookmark the new one and check it!

See you over there at the new diggs.

luv me

this ought to stir up your boredom....

pretend you're a passenger in the car.

I am sick of it I say!!!

Hi y'all ,


Yes, i know I am very behind on updating.
When I started this blog,it was meant to be written in the way that I "normally" think.



Which IS trying to see the humor in the everyday ,mundane things of life.



So ,I really have a hard time posting when I am a negative,angry,annoyed,bored ,depressed,disgusted,evil ,grouchy ,lazy,itchy,hateful,bitter,fat ,intolerant,witch.



It's the damn winter I say!!!



I am going to go ahead and roll with all my rants ...lets just roll with it , shall we:)

*******************************************************************************

Here's the song of the day.....this is a little ditty my sister and I made up a few decades ago.



" I'm in the mood to kill you.....
simply because ..you're near me....

Funny but when you're near meeeee...
I'm in the mood to kill you."



Hit it!y'all.......

**************************************************************************

I am SICK of looking at THIS view.








Sick of dark gray skies, and dead ugly trees.
And extremely sick of 50 mile an hour wind !!!










I am SICK of looking more and more like THIS everyday!!












Sick of THIS!






******************************************************************************




And sick of this!

These are now the ONLY foods my spouse will eat.



















































Perhaps I should be glad.....but I am such a winterized bitch....I am not glad....I am annoyed to death!!!


I feel like throwing away all my spices and seasonings (except for the garlic salt) of course.
That's the only one he will eat.



I feel like I am dealing with my picky kids when they were little.



"I'm awwewgic to hawt dawgs!"


Sorry Dear, It's not you...it's me.

****************************************************************************






AND I am SICK of everything we eat being cooked on the damn egg.


It all tastes the same to me. and I am SICK of it!!!







********************************************************************************
:) ok, I'm done for now. See why i don't update when I'm a hag?







Guys!





Have a great day!!

Mayberry Virginia.......

Happy Friday y'all!


Here's the pictures of Mayberry .
:)













This IS the whole town.

Reminds me of Malvern.










The ONLY hotel in town.













Can't GIVE that real estate away!

No ONE wants to live there.

(especially US!)











Taken by the ONLY condos in town.







*****************************************************************************

Well, how about that crap in Decalb Il. ? What in the hell is wrong with people?


Two of my sons used to live in that town . Rooming with a bunch of students from that school.
I hope they didn't know any of them.

**********************************************************************************
My husband got home yesterday and about 2 minutes later he was snoring . He had gotten up at 3 A.M. to catch his flight home.


So when dinner time rolled around he said "PLEASE, don't make me go out to dinner tonight. "


ack!


So he cooked on the egg. I had a rib eye that was so chewy I couldn't eat it.


Then we watched The O'Reilly factor and The Sarah Connor chronicles.


Damn , we're romantic 'eh? :)



He did bring me a card that said "this card entitles you to a pair of Sapphire ear rings like the one's that melted in the truck fire"


Isn't that sweet? Guess I'll have to get my shoes later . lol

**********************************************************************************
Not sure what my plan is for today. I haven't heard the weather yet. The temp. does dictate my planning. :0

***********************************************************************************

Don't know if you all read my comments or not. So I am posting this hilarious comment here.
This is from my neighbor G5.



"
Well, if you think shopping sux in HS, wait till you shop in south Virginia. Ha! Good luck with that. I am sooo glad shopping is not so much here - saves me some serious money. It is sooo sweet that your hubby is coming home early - prolly because of Valentine's day. Last year I got my sweet little wife a brand new ironing board cover for V day. She was very upset and I had to sleep on the sofa for a week. I think it is because I bought it at Wal-Mart instead of Sears or Penney's. I think. So, to make up for it this year I bought her a new mop bucket. She will get home tomorrow from Okla. and I know she will just love it! Also, she bought way too many Christmas cards, so I took one and marked out all the Christmas stuff and wrote in a Valentine's greeting. I just know she will love that too. Cannot wait to give her her new mop bucket. "



I HOPE you are kidding about the mop bucket G5.


Have a great day peeps!

Happy Valentines day

Happy Valentines day!!!

Hope you all get what you want out of it :)



My husband called me and woke me up at 6 this morning. He was in the airport in Charlotte.He's on his way home a day early.



I was right in the middle of a horrible dream when the phone rang. It was my mother, brother, sister and me. We were staying in the parking lot of our storage unit.My brother had music blaring and i was all young and bitchy saying "he is not sleeping in our space!"



We were all setting up our sleeping area in a parking spot.My mother was sitting up in the back of the uhaul trailer ,barking orders at all of us.i was trying to make Soul think it wasn't so bad. By telling her "remember that time we slept in the car at the drive in?"



Whew!! Thank God that never really happened.



I hate that I am 40 something years old and still have nightmares about living in dire straights with my mother.

******************************************************************************

I'm off the Nyqil! mozzletoff! (how the hell do ya spell that?)



Sunday is the big day that me and my old lady friends are going to the big live theater.We're going to see the female version of "The odd couple"



I really can't wait. Right now ,it's the only thing I have to look forward to.






Oh ! and next month I am looking forward to the raising of the lake. Woo Hoo!
That means we will be un-winterizing the boat.



It will still be cold ,but we'll still be able to cruise around on the lake.



****************************************************************************
We are still in limbo about the whole "moving to Virginia" thing. Which really sucks ! I might add.


The main reason is ...Thinking we were moving, I canceled our gym membership. Now....I just get flabbier by the day.


And ...in the winter ..that's not a bad place to go. It's kind of a form of entertainment. I can only shop sooo much around this lame ass town.


winter sucks. That's what it all boils down to.


I hope to be back later to post the pics hubby took of Virginia.


Have a great Valentines day peeps!

luv me

I'm alive.....

Hi Y'all,

Long time no see:)

I've been reading everyones blogs .I just haven't had the brain power or the eyesight to comment.

i know that some of you have some "real" problems going on and i hope they all work out for you. SOON!

I thought i would spare you more whining about my stupid flu. I think I am finally getting well. My house has managed to stay reasonably put together for the last 2 weeks. I was right in the middle of uprooting all the yard sale stuff ,when the flu struck. So today ,I hope to be back in the saddle of cleaning and boxing up the yard sale stuff.

So far ,getting a slow start. lol I slept in until 8:45. Unheard of!

My husband is in Virginia this week.I made him take a camera.Hopefully he remembers to take some pictures.

Sunday ,we took a drive in the mini car up the mountain tower road. That's where the pictures were from. Apparently everyone writes their names on those rocks. I added ours since I happened to have my trusty sharpy in my purse.

We drove with the top down. It was THAT warm people:)

And unlike some convertibles I have been in, this one was relatively "wind free"

I was prepared to have the hair whipping in my face . But it didn't happen. Awesome!

I am behind on all my correspondence. I have not even called my chilluns.

Hopefully the rest of the week will provide something exciting to blog about :)

Have a great Tuesday peeps!

luv me

Wordless Monday....

Virtual vacation.........

Welcome to the beach!

I hate you t-mobile

We're out dining at Chili's .I feel and LOOK like death warmed over.

After we eat ,I'm outside ,smoking with my smuggled out drink.My hubs, Floozie2 and lake farmer are still at the table.

I'm waiting and waiting...they never come.

I call my hubby on the cell ...trying to be funny.

ring ..ring .."Hello"

"Hi, do you like sick ,hairy ,puffy girls?"

"What?hello?"
click

ring ...ring...again.....
"hello'

"hi , do you like sick,hairy ,puffy girls?"

"WHAT?
I know it's her ,I can see her number"

"Hello!!!! can you hear me?"

"yeah, what?"

"where the hell are you, I'm trying to steal my glass?"

"Oh ok, we're coming."

"son a muh bitchka! thanks you lousy t-mobile for ruining the highlight of my sick night!"

The flu of 1980

Picture it, Colorado Springs, Dec. 1980........

Two poor young idiots (Lena and Robert) have just moved from California with their 5 month old baby, Wesley.

Robert's mom lives out there. So the entire family takes the greyhound to Colorado. They arrive in the middle of the night and no one is there to pick them up. It's freezing cold, and there is 2 feet of snow on the ground.

They stay at Robert's wonderful mother's house for a couple weeks until he gets a paycheck.
Robert's mother is a complete narcissist in a sweater pantsuit named June.

One day Robert is at work and Lena is trying to keep Wesley quiet and calm so he doesn't irritate Miss Pantsuit, Then she becomes riddled with horrendous cramps.

"Oh...lovely," she thinks "just what i need, IT!" ("It" is what my sister and I used to refer to our periods.)

She wrestles Wesley down on the bed and forces him to lay there until he screams himself to sleep so she can writhe in agony in relative peace. The agony gets worse and worse and worse.

"Holy crap, I feel like I'm in labor!" she thinks to herself.

She gets out of the bed, trying desperately not to wake up Wesley so she can go to the bathroom. "Oh F*^%$! Something is VERY wrong here."

She is hemorrhaging. She lays back down and cries until her dumb husband finally gets home.
She tells him "I need to go to the hospital NOW!" realizing that she is probably miscarrying a baby she didn't even know she was pregnant with.

Miss Pantsuit informs her son, that she "will allow him to take his miscarrying, bleeding to death wife to the hospital in her car - but only if he first goes to Safeway and gets her prescription because she has pneumonia."

So, being 21 years old and dumb... he does exactly as his narcissistic mommy tells him and goes to Safeway to get mommy's prescription while his wife sits in the car hemorrhaging and having labor pains for half an hour. (Good thing those seats were vinyl... ew!)

The young dumb couple delivers the meds to Mommy and heads off to the hospital. Leaving poor Wesley to hang out with his haggish, pneumonia stricken grandma.

Upon arrival to the hospital, they immediately whisk Lena off to an operating room for a D&C and tell her "sorry, you are losing your baby."

She gags as they yank a tube out of her throat and groggily says 'when are they gonna do it?"

"Oh , we're done honey, but we can't seem to find your husband."

*Sigh* "Try looking out in the parking lot, he's probably so worried, he's sleeping in the car."

Sure enough, that's where they found him.

Poor Lena is sent "home" right then.

Lucky for her, the very next day they are supposed to be moving into their own rental. Woo hoo!

There she is, pale, weak and devastated but hey, it's moving day! So while Robert's at work, her and Wesley move their meager possessions over to the new house. On foot.

The living room is painted silver. WTH?

They get moved in, but have to spend the night at the mother's until they come turn on the utilities. And the very next day Lena wakes up with the flu. The gas company is also supposed to come to turn on the gas.

That morning her and Wesley walk over to the new house and wait for the gas company. Flu? Yes. After pains? Yes... but thank God we're out of that witch's house!

Then the gas company comes and "red tags the water heater and the heater" instead of turning them on. red tagging them means they are not safe to turn on.

Lovely. Lena hangs up blankets all around the dining room, turns on the electric oven, swaddles Wesley in a snowsuit, and lays him in his port-a-crib and covers him up with a feather pillow.

Then she collapses on the bed herself and just lays there trying not to die for the next week from flu and miscarriage.

Robert comes home to have the flu as well.

Lena only got out of the freezing cold bed to take care of Wesley. Everyone was too damn sick to do anything about moving into a suitable home. No heat except the oven. Every trip to the freezing cold toilet was a trip to shivering hell.

The entire family is lucky to have lived through the FLU 0f 1980.

And THAT was the last time I had the flu. So all in all, as horrible as it is this time. It could be and has been worse.

Nyquil nighty...... Hope your days are all better than they could be . :)

Luv me

Gag me with a mystery ingredient.....

Him : as he is squirting Afrin up my nose (while I plug one nostril at a time)

"What's wrong with your eyes?"

Me: as I'm dying "Ugh they're swollen?"

Him: "yeah your whole face looks swollen"

Me:in thought ,as I'm dying "yeah ,I'm lookin' poppin' fresh, homie"

That was the longest conversation we had the entire weekend.

He got home Friday evening. I was already on my deathbed.

"Hi, you better kiss my cheek, I got a grocery store chicken , goodbye" Then I went to bed.

I spent the entire weekend in bed......it hurt too bad to be awake and it hurt too bad to sleep. Everything hurt! At one point I told my spouse "my God , even my teeth hurt!"

I could barely breathe ,much less talk . All I could do is rasp out "I need more Nyquil"

Yesterday ,he left here about one to go to the airport. I wake up from my Nyquil daze, and look forlornly at the contents of the kitchen. I eat more orange sherbet.

Then I take my next dose of Nyquil and get back in bed. I sit and smoke a forbidden cigarette right in my bedroom and think to myself "you KNOW he's gonna come right back home now"

Then about 5 ,I hear a noise and I rasp out (to the cats) "what the hell are you doing?"

no answer. lol

Then a second later , there's my husband at the doorway "well, I'm back"

(see, told ya!) Flight canceled ...etc..etc.. "now I can watch the superbowl"

"now you can feed us"

Well, like I said ,the pickins were pretty slim around here. so I said "How bout toast and eggs."

I heard him as he scraped the burnt blackness off my toast . Then when he brought me the eggs I smelled something I couldn't identify ,with my sick nose.

"what's in these eggs?"

"why, aren't they good?"

"ugh, dry heave, yeah ."

He never did tell me , but it was Gorgonzola cheese or roasted garlic ...(mystery food) something that is not meant for people with the flu. I'm afraid to know now.

That was my last coherent memory of the superbowl fun. I woke a couple times and heard him yelling "go ! go! "

or some crap.

Today I am still sick as a dog and can barely talk ...but man ...nowhere near the agony of the last few days.

I looked in the mirror today (actually the first time I could even see clearly enough to know how bad I looked) And WHEW! I looked AWFUL!

My face looked like an albino rat. Two tiny holes for eyes, in a pasty white face,red nose. Hair like a greasy haystack. Black t-shirt with numerous food stains. Red sweat pants I've been rockin for 3 days.Mouth hanging open ..doing the mouth breathing thing. OMG! I hope my husband does come back .
Good LAWD!!! I'm ugly!!!


Hope y'all have been good while I was gone and hope to God you don't get the flu.